A Snapshot

So to start the posting, I thought I'd record just a bit of what our lives all look like right now...I suppose to provide a starting place for future blogs.

Jason is a 3rd year law student. He has done a remarkable job juggling all the stresses of law school. He came out with a great resume and great grades. In an economy such as this, our main stress as of late is finding that right job for us. We've got a few options we are hoping and praying for right now. We know that it will all turn out in the end, and that even 10 years from now we'll look back at this time and wonder to ourselves why we worried so much. In the moment, with two babies to take care of and debt to deal with, it's still a little disconcerting. But we are confident that we'll be taken care of as long as we keep doing all we can do.

I stay at home with the babies. Keeping up with them and the house keeps me extremely busy. Other than the home and motherly duties (most of my news will be their news), I teach a class on Sundays to the Young Women (16-17 year old girls) and help out with Tuesday night youth group activities.

The best word to describe Rachel...passionate. That girl is truly passionate about being happy when she's happy, and passionately angry when she's angry. She's two (almost three), so this is I'm sure how many two year old's can be, but she's always added a little spice to our lives. She is so so so smart. She's always telling us funny things. Right now she loves watching movies, dancing, and going to Joy school. She and I get to do Joy school this year, where I teach 2 days per month. It's kind of a co-op preschool where 4 moms rotate weeks. We only do it two days per week, for just 2 1/2 hours per day, but it has been a good experience so far. Rachel really loves going and she's made some new friends. She's learning all about different types of "Joy," i.e. the joy of the body, the joy of the earth, the joy of being honest, etc. It gives me a great mindset and framework to talk about lots of different things in life with her. If nothing else, I think it's helped me be a more proactive mother in teaching her about the world.

Alden is my little sweetie. He is incredibly tender and his smile really can just melt your soul. I could gush over him all day. He has had a hard time teething (for what feels like his whole life), and already had to get two hematoma cysts in his gums lanced so the teeth could come in. But aside from those bumps in the road, he sleeps well at night (finally...this was a long time coming) and is healthy. I just stopped nursing him a few days ago (this has been wearing on me for a long time and I've wanted to stop but didn't know how-with Rachel it wasn't really a choice when to stop). It has been a little emotional for him, but I'm feeling great about it. He's eating a little better than before (getting this kid to eat is somewhat difficult).

Anyways, that's kind of an update of what we're like right now. I need to post more later about all the funny things Rachel says now and the words Alden knows.

Another thought on my mind today, it really is incredible how fragile life is. Our friends lost their little baby girl yesterday morning at just 11 days old. She was born with a heart problem. I've been thinking today about how I felt about my babies when they were 11 days old, and while I can't actually know how our friends must feel, I just hurt for them. It's times like these, when really sad, unexplainable things happen to good people, that I'm grateful I know about this. Knowing God's plan has helped me wrap my head around tough things. And while it doesn't make bad things good, it does bring peace, even through hard times.

A Fresh Start

As many of you know, I previously ran a blog a few years ago, mostly about Rachel. About the time I started getting sick during my pregnancy with Alden things just petered out and I never felt like I could get back into it. I've been wanting to blog again, but it just feels like so long since I've posted. I don't want to feel the need to catch up, because I definitely never could. So I decided to just start fresh.

I titled the blog "Not One Empty Chair" because that's how I feel about my children and my family. As a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, I believe that our time here in this life, while vitally important, is not the end of existence. I believe that we'll exist as a family with generations before and after. I want to sit down at our family table after this life, and I want all of my children there with me. I don't want any empty chairs because I didn't teach them to choose the right. I also believe that if my children and family members want to be there, they will be. We all have that choice.

So welcome to our new blog. I'm now sleeping regularly, so I feel a lot more energized and have as of late been feeling a real need to write things about the children down. If there is one thing I've learned about motherhood, it's that in the moment I think that I'll remember things forever...and then just a short while later I don't. No matter how hard I try, I can't replay that moment in my mind again. Some of that is probably attributable to constant sleep deprivation for 3 or so years, but I think I could remember more if I wrote things down immediately. And it's not too late. My babies are young...Miss Rach is only 2, and Alden boy is barely 1. As guilty as I feel for not recording every funny thing they've said or every tender moment, it's not all lost to me. I've still got time to record them! So that's why I'm starting over, and starting now.

I'm stealing this from my cousin's blog, but I think it's exactly the reason I want to record all of these memories:

"What could you do better for your children and your children’s children than to record the story of your life, your triumphs over adversity, your recovery after a fall, your progress when all seemed black, your rejoicing when you had finally achieved? Begin today and write your deepest thoughts, your achievements and your failures, your associations and your triumphs, your impressions and your testimonies and the angels may quote from it for eternity."
Spencer W. Kimball